glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
