some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize