small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
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