We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
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