i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize
