Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
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