She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize