ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
She needs sedatives and a leash
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
