I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Randomize
