Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
