I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
they need to just BURY HIM!
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
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