dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
