I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
