In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
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