That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
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