Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
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