Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
