i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
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