Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
