nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
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