it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
