Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
Randomize
