Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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