I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Help. Why am I so naked?
I forget how to act sober
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
