I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
We had to coat check the pizza.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
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Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Randomize