thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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