p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
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