He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize