it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Randomize
