just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Randomize
