Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
