I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
I'm gonna fight the coyote
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
