he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
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