Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Randomize
