So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
