yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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