Why are handjobs necessary in class?
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Randomize
