this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I need to calm my uterus...
Randomize
