I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Randomize
