Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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