im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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