You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
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