I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize