I hope mine doesn't look like that
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Randomize
