WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Randomize
