TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
