I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Randomize
