I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Randomize