He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
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