Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(313): View more from Michigan

Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.

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(313): Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone. http://tfl.nu/vfbd

Replies (40) Good night (14347) Bad night (1657)
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(617): View more from Massachusetts

but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back

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(617): but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back http://tfl.nu/ogq4

Replies (30) Good night (1001) Bad night (2336)
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(703): View more from Virginia

My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?

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(703): My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall? http://tfl.nu/yddz

Replies (51) Good night (6094) Bad night (842)
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(918): View more from Oklahoma

When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty

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(918): When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty http://tfl.nu/ybq4

Replies (19) Good night (1257) Bad night (6817)
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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.

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(780): Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah. http://tfl.nu/5le1

Replies (10) Good night (1168) Bad night (4302)
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(315): View more from New York

Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.

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(315): Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over. http://tfl.nu/878e

Replies (40) Good night (1657) Bad night (7394)
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(347): View more from New York

when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign

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(347): when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign http://tfl.nu/d21d

Replies (22) Good night (2912) Bad night (1515)
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(419): View more from Ohio

The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .

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(419): The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. . http://tfl.nu/zh9v

Replies (24) Good night (7648) Bad night (1092)
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(615): View more from Tennessee

This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer

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(615): This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer http://tfl.nu/0w8r

Replies (6) Good night (1801) Bad night (807)
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(479): View more from Arkansas

Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?

(1-479): View more from Arkansas

If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area

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(479): Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius? (1-479): If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area http://tfl.nu/19ec

Replies (10) Good night (1931) Bad night (685)
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(650): View more from California

Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night

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(650): Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night http://tfl.nu/338b

Replies (9) Good night (1579) Bad night (559)
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(614): View more from Ohio

It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.

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(614): It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment. http://tfl.nu/va62

Replies (5) Good night (672) Bad night (506)
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(614): View more from Ohio

I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed

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(614): I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed http://tfl.nu/qw2u

Replies (0) Good night (611) Bad night (332)
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(317): View more from Indiana

That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.

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(317): That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT. http://tfl.nu/8h80

Replies (4) Good night (1144) Bad night (318)
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(619): View more from California

had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx

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(619): had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx http://tfl.nu/v96h

Replies (0) Good night (428) Bad night (275)

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