Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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